why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Randomize
