i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
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