I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
