She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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