you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize