Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize
