I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
