the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
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