Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
