I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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