Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
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