When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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