its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
