This is not my ceiling
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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