Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
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