he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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