You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
