Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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