i don't like sucking hair
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize