I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
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He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
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It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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