no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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