I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
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