When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize