then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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