hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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