dude i'm inner monologue high
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
