ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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