so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.