and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
