ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
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