This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
