i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
