he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize