Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
