Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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