I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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