Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
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