He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize