he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
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Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
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I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
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