I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize