i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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