Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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