so let's talk penis.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
