Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s http://tfl.nu/wt0n
  Replies (28) Good night (5048) Bad night (683)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): im trying to catch a child molester. call you later. http://tfl.nu/dlxg
  Replies (21) Good night (5260) Bad night (1010)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer? http://tfl.nu/yj7n
  Replies (26) Good night (4589) Bad night (785)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (574): no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house" http://tfl.nu/wkle
  Replies (13) Good night (1356) Bad night (8716)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out http://tfl.nu/vv84
  Replies (38) Good night (1137) Bad night (3537)
• Favorite

  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (506): Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes. http://tfl.nu/7d2r
  Replies (2) Good night (1842) Bad night (589)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Let's just rave with boners that last for hours

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): Let's just rave with boners that last for hours http://tfl.nu/lox1
  Replies (27) Good night (1816) Bad night (1104)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (705): I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him' http://tfl.nu/4xts
  Replies (2) Good night (532) Bad night (887)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (408): Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday. http://tfl.nu/vfie
  Replies (2) Good night (967) Bad night (496)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag. http://tfl.nu/a3yi
  Replies (4) Good night (509) Bad night (486)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise http://tfl.nu/rwe2
  Replies (1) Good night (854) Bad night (236)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.

  (440): View more from Ohio

  and SLEEP god I love sleep

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal. (440): and SLEEP god I love sleep http://tfl.nu/p4ha
  Replies (0) Good night (1090) Bad night (282)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (306): we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter.... http://tfl.nu/0sk3
  Replies (2) Good night (204) Bad night (490)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway. http://tfl.nu/fnux
  Replies (1) Good night (230) Bad night (442)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho http://tfl.nu/voi4
  Replies (1) Good night (467) Bad night (377)

Randomize