Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)

  (650): View more from California

  nah, i'm gonna grab some food

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  (408): hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;) (650): nah, i'm gonna grab some food http://tfl.nu/jz1a
  Replies (122) Good night (4514) Bad night (36009)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"

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  (440): I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!" http://tfl.nu/07u8
  Replies (21) Good night (6644) Bad night (839)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently

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  (269): i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently http://tfl.nu/x6zf
  Replies (17) Good night (5092) Bad night (699)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.

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  (814): Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade. http://tfl.nu/7055
  Replies (49) Good night (1451) Bad night (7590)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.

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  (845): Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad. http://tfl.nu/mllb
  Replies (18) Good night (740) Bad night (5075)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people

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  (717): ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people http://tfl.nu/gtxu
  Replies (13) Good night (4925) Bad night (730)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.

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  (815): I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe. http://tfl.nu/z3x3
  Replies (43) Good night (7911) Bad night (1940)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now

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  (516): Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now http://tfl.nu/8cl1
  Replies (9) Good night (1442) Bad night (4555)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car

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  (713): Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car http://tfl.nu/eifp
  Replies (11) Good night (3524) Bad night (1122)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that

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  (610): Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that http://tfl.nu/6wwt
  Replies (9) Good night (2521) Bad night (1299)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?

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  (901): I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter? http://tfl.nu/wyo3
  Replies (6) Good night (1499) Bad night (570)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.

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  (440): I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me. http://tfl.nu/twlr
  Replies (6) Good night (660) Bad night (1183)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.

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  (314): How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night. http://tfl.nu/t7tp
  Replies (5) Good night (632) Bad night (916)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW

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  (778): I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on (778): SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW http://tfl.nu/dpzm
  Replies (1) Good night (741) Bad night (399)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour

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  (306): this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour http://tfl.nu/3t2e
  Replies (3) Good night (454) Bad night (257)

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