i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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