Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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