i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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