I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Randomize