Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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