The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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